"Butterfingers"

March 28, 2020

10:20 pm

  A few days ago while I was at work, seemingly out of the blue I heard the voice of this entity attachment (Crystal) call me “Butterfingers”. This instantly caught my attention. “Butterfingers” was a nickname that my football coach jokingly gave me when I was playing “pee-wee” football at a very young age (I don’t even remember how old I was….this is going way back).

  My coach gave me this nickname (as a joke) because I dropped the football a number of times during our football games. What is interesting here is that I am certain that I have not thought of this memory in a very long time……possibly decades. However, when Crystal called me “Butterfingers” the other day, I knew exactly what she was referring to.

  What this tells me is that it would seem that Crystal has access to what I can only call “my dormant memories.” By this I mean memories that I would recall if something caused me to remember, but that otherwise I would not even be thinking about for long periods of time. Memories not forgotten, but not being think about frequently at all.

  I’ve known since I was experimenting with EVP in 2015, that these entities/voices that came out if the recordings and attacked me with “hijacked clairaudience” could pick up on my thoughts (or at least some of them seemed to have this ability). I’ve often described Crystal as having a “telepathic wiretap” within my mind. Since 2015, she in particular has gone out of her way to let me know that she has the ability to intrude into and spy upon my thoughts.

  During the worst days of my attachment situation (in April, 2015) I would often hear her voice mocking and condemning me for things that I was simply thinking. A common phrase I heard from her back then was “what the hell are you thinking?” This intrusion into my mind hit me hard….very hard. All sense of privacy disappeared completely. It took a toll on me….always carrying around that feeling that what I was thinking was under surveillance. I found myself much more self-conscious of my own thoughts…..much more so than I ever had been before in all my life.

  I tried to deliberately control my thoughts in a futile effort to try and avoid hearing heckling comments from these voices regarding my thoughts. Yet, thoughts can be a very tricky thing to try and control. I began to notice that my thoughts would stray very easily. If I tried to tell myself not to think about something in particular to avoid “commentary”, I usually discovered that my own mind would quickly betray me.

  It has taken me a long time to even begin to recover from this overwhelming sense of intrusion down into the very core of my being. I can deal with it much better these days than I could back in the beginning I’m glad to report. Yet, I was still troubled the other day when I heard Crystal call me “Butterfingers” because I knew that this was a memory that I had not been thinking about recently. It seems to me that she went searching through my mind…..searching for “dormant memories” that she could incorporate into her “mind games.” She is often telling me how much of a “superior life form” she is to me. This is one of those occasions where I confess that she has some abilities far beyond my own.

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