Hearing Voices Entity Attachment : Night Intrusions 6-2-21

 June 2, 2021

   Well I may have spoke a little too soon in my previous blog post where I said that this entity attachment, the one that I hear as a female voice and that goes by the name Crystal, hasn’t been attacking me at night recently. For the past two nights I’ve experienced what I consider an attack. As I said in the previous post, every night I’m experiencing some degree of disturbance from her. However, I don’t always classify this as an outright attack. On some nights when I get into bed, I’ll just hear her voice chattering away and I will feel the physical sensations to a degree, but they’re not that intense. I’m so used to it by now that certain levels of this does not prevent me from falling asleep like it once did. However, there are other occasions when her chattering and the physical sensations are much more intense, things are much more escalated and I get the impression that it’s very intentional, that she’s intentionally doing this to try and deprive me of sleep. I was saying in my previous blog post the other day that I had not experienced one of these nightly attacks for a few weeks and I took this as a good sign. However, I experienced an attack last night and the night before. These attacks weren’t all that terrible, but things were escalated and as I said... it’s really the impression that I get where I can tell that Crystal is putting in some extra effort here to cause me a disturbance and trouble when I’m trying to fall asleep.

  I had also mentioned in my previous post that I’ve been going without taking any sleep-aid recently. This is no small thing in my situation because sleep-aid has been something that I’ve been very reliant upon going back to the early days, back in 2015. Occasionally, I might have gone a night or two without it here and there, but for the most part I’ve been taking it on a nightly basis since 2015. This was not something that I was happy about, but I felt that I simply didn’t have a choice, that I needed to sleep and that I simply couldn’t take any chances. 

  Earlier on in my situation, I was losing a lot of sleep because of all that I was experiencing. It would be a common occurrence where I would lose an entire night of sleep quite often or half a night of sleep. This is the result of what I was talking about in my previous blog post ....where I mentioned that a big difference between us and these attaching entities is that require sleep, we need to rest...we need downtime. As far as I have observed, these entities do not. When they set out to harass a person, they can keep going with it around the clock to an extreme degree. So, this really derailed the hell out of my sleep routine earlier on. The only thing that I had to rely on was taking a sleep-aid practically every night. This wasn’t always effective, but it was effective a lot of the time, and at least it was something that I had.

   This eventually took its toll on me as I’ve described quite often in my writing. I’ve often compared taking this sleep-aid so much to doing shots at night before you go to bed. It was a very common thing for me to wake up in the morning feeling like I was experiencing a minor hangover, like my mind was in a haze. It seemed like the sleep-aid hadn’t completely worn off. Earlier on in my situation, I would take some sleep-aid before I went to bed and then if I was still having a particularly rough time falling asleep, I would get out of bed and take more. Sometimes I might get out of bed two or three times in one night to take more sleep-aid because I was very desperate to get as much sleep as I could. I knew that if these entities caused me to lose an entire night of sleep, that I would be hurting in the next day. Sometimes I’d be taking sleep-aid up until two or three in the morning and I’d have to wake up and go to work the next day. 

  There were many occasions when I felt like I was in a fog in the morning ....like the sleep-aid was still kicking in. I was trying to get up and get going, but the sleep-aid was still trying to put me to sleep. It carried its own problems with it, but as I said.... it’s all I had. I think this is something that’s related to me in particular in a sense. As I mentioned in previous blog post here, I’ve met many others since 2015 who are also dealing with the same kind of attachment situation. Some of them have these kinds of problems at night trying to fall asleep, some of them don’t. Some of them have developed ways to adapt to the situation and find something that helps them to fall asleep. Some of the others I know mentioned that they can listen to music when they’re falling asleep or have the television on to try and drown out the presence of the voices. This kind of thing never works for me. I’m a very light sleeper, I need things to be as quiet as possible to fall asleep easily. So all this time I felt like the sleep-aid was really all I had to turn to even though I knew it wasn’t exactly healthy for me to take it this much and that it brought on its own problems. 

  Earlier this year I tried to go without it, a little experiment of sorts, just to see what would happen. Unfortunately I was not successful in breaking free of it. I think I went one or two nights without any, experienced an escalated attack and I decided to go back to the sleep-aid for now and try this again later, such as during the winter when things are a bit more quiet at my job. However, recently things have been very busy at work. It’s just a busy time of year for me, as it always is, but this year is a bit more hectic than usual. 

  The pandemic situation caused the boom in the industry that I work in....so yes, things have been a lot busier and a lot more hectic. At times I’ve been so exhausted at night that I just crawled into bed and fell asleep, like I had completely forgotten about taking any sleep-aid. I did this for a few days straight and I realized one day recently and thought to myself....”hey I haven’t been taking any sleep-aid and it’s actually been going quite well”.  Then something with Crystal happened and I took it again for a night or two. I began to notice a difference in the morning with how I felt when I had taken the sleep-aid the night before and when I didn’t. I found that if I had not taken sleep-aid the night before, it was easier for me to get out of bed and get out and get going. I’ve been waking up early a lot these days to go take care of some work related issues before I head into the office. So I’ve noticed how I’ve felt in the morning since I’ve been waking up earlier. I noticed that if I had taken sleep-aid the night before, then it was more difficult for me to wake up early and get going. In fact, there were some mornings recently when I simply couldn’t do it. I had something that I wanted to go take care of before I had to be in the office, but I just couldn’t do it. I still felt too much like my mind was in a haze.

  So, I figured that this was a good time to see how long I could make it without taking any. I’ve been trying not to take it on most nights recently. For the most part, I’d say that things have been going rather well, however there has been some issues. I noticed that when I don’t take sleep-aid, I tend to linger in that state where I am half-asleep and half-awake for a bit longer. It’s never a guarantee, but I think that this is something that the sleep-aid helps prevent from happening quite often. 

  When I take the sleep-aid, it’s more like I’m waiting to fall asleep, ....still waiting to fall asleep, and then I’m just out like a light, knocked out essentially. When I don’t take the sleep-aid, I just tend to linger in that in-between zone for a while. As I mentioned before, when I am really in that in-between zone, that state between being awake and being asleep, I lose all sense of time sometimes. I am partly asleep, yet I’m still awake enough to realize that I’m not fully asleep and I just don’t know what time it is or how long I’ve been lingering there in this state. Sometimes it seems like only a short time, sometimes it seems like hours. Sometimes it seems like I fall asleep and then a little while later I partially wake up, but not completely and I’m just lingering there in that in-between zone for a while before I fall back asleep again. It’s very strange. For the last two nights, I hadn’t taken any sleep-aid and it was when I was lingering in that in-between zone that I experienced these attacks.

  Two nights ago it occurred when I was in that in- between state, and this was one of those instances where it seemed like I had fallen asleep but had partially woken back up, yet not completely. It might be that Crystal intentionally waited until I was almost asleep and then started escalating her harassment. That’s pretty much how it seemed to me these past two nights. The other night I noticed that all of a sudden the physical sensations became quite intense and her voice became stronger and she was talking very closely, like she was right up in my face. That night, just in my thoughts I was begging with her to leave me alone and let me sleep and it seemed like she eventually stopped. 

 Then it happened again last night, also when I was in that in-between zone. Once again, it seemed like I had fallen asleep and then was brought back to the point where I was partially awake, lingering in that state for quite a while. Last night’s attack was a little more intense than the previous night. The physical sensations were quite intense and I remember experiencing a few shout attacks. This is the tactic that I’ve described quite often, where Crystal will shout very intensely right in my face or right up to one of my ears. She didn’t hit me with too many shouts last night. If my memory serves me correctly, it was only two or three. It seems like she uses these shouts these days just when she’s attacking like this, where in the past it was at times and almost nightly occurrence. 

  At one point last night during the attack, I remember Crystal saying quite clearly “I am a different species.” I definitely heard this from her, there’s no mistaking it. I believe that this is connected to what I had been writing in my other blog post this past week, where I was describing how Crystal was going strong with playing her identity mind game with me recently. This is where she will make claims about herself, about her identity, and as I was saying, she can sound very convincing, but then she’ll switch it around and contradict herself. 

  The two main claims that she’s been making about herself recently are that she’s a spirit of human origin, and she’ll often talk to me about when she was a high school student in the early 1980s. And again, the way she talks about this sounds very convincing. She doesn’t miss a beat when she’s telling a story. It really seems like she’s retelling a very vivid memory of hers. However, then she’ll switch it up and I’ll start hearing her talk about being of a different species, she’ll start talking about extraterrestrials and other worlds and other dimensions. In other words, one minute she’s claiming to be of human origin, the next minute she’s claiming to be of non-human origin.  And as I stated previously, I just threw my hands up in the air in frustration because I can’t really gauge her with this. I can’t even say that she sounds more convincing with one of these claims over the other. In my opinion, she sounds equally convincing with both.

   I was saying the other day in my previous post that sometimes she’ll just use the term “astral being” to describe herself and that I actually like this term and I use it myself. I feel that this works for me because I do believe personally that this is what she is. I do believe that she is a sentient being that is residing on an astral plane, or astral  dimension.  In my opinion this term astral being can include beings that are of human origin, such as spirits who were once human and lived on Earth.  Yet, it can also include beings that or not of human origin. Perhaps some of them once lived in a physical form on another world somewhere in our universe. Perhaps some lived on some other world in another dimension or a parallel universe. And perhaps some never lived in a physical form at all, at least not as we tend to think of it. Perhaps some existed as pure energy throughout their entire existence. Yet, all of these different kinds of sentient intelligent beings could perhaps be called astral beings. It’s my own personal belief that this term can apply to all of these things. So, even though I’ve stated that I threw my hands up in frustration even trying to hold to a personal belief about Crystal’s true identity and origin, classifying her as an astral being is the closest that I can come to this, at least for now.

  Well, I have experience two night attacks in a row now. It seems that the fact that I’m lingering in the in-between state at night has made me a bit more vulnerable, as it often has. However, I’m going to try and keep going without the sleep-aid for now and see what happens. Yes, I’ve had two unpleasant incidents so far with this, but if I stick it out for a little while longer, perhaps the reward will be worth it. I guess I’ll never know unless I try and that is what I think it really comes down to.